It is time
because we love our children too much to let them be scared alone
My youngest child, my daughter, graduated from grade 8 yesterday. The night before she asked me to talk about World War III. Is it going to happen? Why is it happening? Isn’t there usually a reason for a war? She made a sad joke over dinner. “At least I’m going to live to have one graduation.”
This is being a teenager in 2025. Kids are afraid and confused, because the adults in their daily life generally seem to be well meaning and trustworthy, but the actions of adults on a global scale are literally burning their future to the ground. It is confusing not to be able to trust adults when you are still a child; it is terrible.
Kids have all the usual stuff to deal with, puberty and friend dramas, homework stress and competitive sports tryouts. They are hitting all the usual milestones, all the while lying awake at night wondering about the massive crises going on in the world; massive crises most adults don’t talk about in front of them. Do we not talk to them about these things because then we think they won’t know about them? Do we think we’re trying not to burden them? Joke’s on us; they are aware of everything going on but when adults don’t bring any of it up in conversation it is the world’s biggest gaslight. The world is a dumpster fire but my parents don’t seem to notice. What the hell?
Adults don’t talk to each other about this stuff, either. I know this from years of climate activism. Most people don’t talk about climate, or didn’t until a couple years ago when some tipping point happened and it became normal for people to reference the fact that the world is on fire.
Most adults I know aren’t talking about the genocide happening in Palestine.
Most adults aren’t talking about the overreach of power happening at both our provincial and federal levels of government.
Most adults aren’t talking about what the hell we could be doing to stop any of these runaway trains.
Why don’t we talk about these things? Well, we are scared shitless, and we don’t feel like we know enough to say anything. It’s also awkward to bring up depressing topics. I know. I’m that person sometimes, and most people don’t say anything in response if I talk about the climate, the genocide, human rights for everyone. The silence is thick. What I am trying to say is “I love this world and the people in it so much that I am horrified about xyz thing that is happening. I imagine a better way; I want us to make a better way.” What I think most people hear is “I want to take you out of your comfortable life to force you to think about really scary things, and I am blaming you, and I expect you to sacrifice your every comfort to save the world.”
No. That is not it. But there are sacrifices we need to make, and we need to do it because we love our children too much to let them be scared alone. We need to sacrifice the little bubble of comfort we create around ourselves by refusing to talk about uncomfortable things. We need to sacrifice our willful ignorance, and we need to sacrifice the privilege to do nothing in the face of massive, unimaginable horrors unfolding all around us. We need to stop pretending we don’t know, because we do know. We all know, and our kids know and they need to see their parents and grandparents, aunts and teachers and coaches acting like it matters. They need to hear us talk about all of it and they need to see us do something.
"One day, when it's safe, when there's no personal downside to calling a thing what it is, when it's too late to hold anyone accountable, everyone will have always been against this." - Omar El Akkad
It may not feel safe, but it is time. When I can’t tell my child that World War III isn’t happening - “I don’t know” - when I can’t explain why the people in charge refuse to take action to stop ecological collapse even though we have all the tools we need - “I don’t know” - when I can’t deny that the richest and most powerful among us are actively accelerating ecological collapse and playing at war while most of us in the western world wring our hands believing we are powerless to do anything about it - “I don’t know” - it is time.
It is not safe, and our kids need us to walk alongside them through the darkness - it is time.
In fact it’s long overdue.
xo
Shannon
Upcoming Shows
July 16 from 3-6pm
Come find me making music at the Cobourg Public Library Book and Bake Sale. Then buy some goodies to support our local library!
July 19
I am hosting a Campfire Songcircle at Westben. It’s a free event prior to Matt Andersen’s show. For details and to RSVP click here.
August 2 5-7:30pm - Join me on the Black Cat patio (Cobourg)
August 31 - Common Ground Festival with Lucas Marchand (Headwaters Farm)
Input Please!
Some of my upcoming shows will include more cover songs than usual, so I’m adding some new ones to my set. I’d love to know which of these three you’d most like to hear from me:
Rain King by the Counting Crows
Hideout by Sarah Harmer
Dancing in the Dark by Bruce Springsteen
Yes, yes and more yes to all of this! And teenagedom is itself a threshold, I think, when our children don't simply absorb the vibes of their context--family/community/world--but begin to grasp at understanding their worlds on an intellectual level, which makes that kind of support and sense of ongoing conversation at home even more significant. There is much goodness and strength in this young generation.
Thank you, Shannon for being bold and brave. I find it hard to balance talking about these things, or sharing views of these topics on social media with talking about and sharing hopeful/benign topics like gardening and flowers and art. The Western world has had a pretty good run for the past 70 years. We collectively think it will go on forever and surround ourselves with distractions..... like gardening and flowers and art.... and sports and consumerism..... and ... and ... and... Many of us want to hide our heads in the sand and hope it will all go away.
I don't want to look in the face of my 4 grandkids 10 years from now when they ask me why I didn't do anything or say anything? That's why I sprinkle a little Heather Cox Richardson in between peony and poppy posts. Trying to find a balance that will be acceptable to brains that are scared.
Investing ourselves locally to make a better Northumberland for everyone might be a good place to start. Maybe it will have a ripple effect.
Keep being you, Shannon.