Here’s how my brain works when it comes to productivity. Waking up before 6:30am: hard pass. Only willing to do so under duress. Also, doing anything productive after 6pm: not really a thing. I can sometimes teach in the evening, but only because the energy of other people and the way you “switch on” to teach carries me through. I certainly can’t write in the evening. Frankly I don’t even do my dishes after dinner because I just become a floppy sack of flop.
I don’t relate, therefore, to people who get up before everyone else in their house to carve out time to work or workout or meditate. No, I am sleeping. No thank you. I also don’t relate to folks who burn the midnight oil, who feel most creative after dark. See above re: sleeping.
Maybe I just sleep too much? Or maybe everyone else sleeps too little. That feels true to me. If people are carving up their early mornings and late nights to get shit done, they are certainly not getting a tidy eight hours.
Let me tell you, I am a person who needs eight hours of sleep. I am unpleasant to be around if I’m tired, and I am tired if I get less than seven hours of sleep. Two or three nights in a row like that and I am a wreck. A grumpy, snarly wreck who doesn’t like you, or you. Or him.
Also, whilst we’re delving into the secrets of my great productivity, I don’t like to do anything on Sundays. The past few weekends I’ve had lots of plans and, honestly, I’m freaking exhausted. (Can we drop f-bombs here? I couldn’t decide, so I cleaned that one up for you.) On Sundays I want to lounge on my couch in slippers with a tea and a book. Maybe go for a walk. Probably there is a heating pad involved.
And one more thing: talking about how much I sleep and how much I need my lazy Sundays feels embarrassing. I have at various times felt plenty of shame about my lack of drive. I still wonder sometimes why I’m built this way when it appears that other people have so much more energy than I. But getting enough sleep also feels a bit anti-capitalist, and that makes me happy enough to push through the embarrassment and declare myself “a person who rests.”
I’m not lazy, I’m counter-cultural. My revolution involves sleep.
xo
Shannon
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Featured Song - I Want
Apparently I’ve been grappling with productivity vs. contentedness for a few years now.
”I want to learn to play cello, I want to run
ten kilometers without doubling over
I want to effortlessly juggle work and children
While still being gorgeous and keeping my house clean
But mostly I want to spend my nights on the couch
With my feet in your lap and a tea in my hands
Laughing and talking and watching TV
While the kids snore softly in their beds asleep”
This, I believe, could also be called balance. Thanks for naming this one out loud, Shannon. I will join your revolution --- already there!
I just love this piece Shannon ! I totally relate to turning into a sloth after 6 or 7 pm . Lol I used to detest my baseball games when we played the late one at 8:30. While I am a morning person, I have come to enjoy not “having “ to get up before 6:30 on weekends. Who knows, one day my retirement may not be such a bad thing