The busy bus and the wahmbulance
Am I busy or am I happy? I find I can’t be both, though I suppose it depends on how I define the word happy. If happiness is about having new experiences, reaching goals, trying new things, and making memories, then I can be busy and happy. But if happiness requires me to feel centred and grounded in myself, to feel a sense of calm and peace within my body, and to feel connected to the things that really matter to me, then it is very much at odds with what happens when I get busy.
There is a balance to be struck, I would think, between feeling centred and grounded and whole, and occasionally pushing outside of my comfort zone to have extraordinary experiences or to get important projects done. I notice that balance usually works like a pendulum swing between TOO MUCH and NOT ENOUGH, never like landing in the middle sweet spot and sitting there. That’s okay, though. The NOT ENOUGH times refill my energy stores, and after a bit of time living in NOT ENOUGH I crave some TOO MUCH.
Now I’m going to say something incredibly privileged and probably annoying. I’m sorry.
The trip my family took to Italy and Scotland this year was TOO MUCH. Leading up to the trip we were so excited and the anticipation was a lot of fun. While we were on the trip we had a beautiful time and made wonderful memories, and I know it was a once in a lifetime experience for my kids. Since the trip, though, we’ve all struggled to recover. Our summers are already quite busy and adding a very full two week trip and jet lag into the mix was a bridge too far.
We haven’t caught up nor caught our breath from that trip. I hate that feeling, but I am learning something very important about myself in the aftermath. I don’t need to travel the world to discover fresh and breathtaking things, and I currently prefer to stay closer to home. I find our part of the world unbelievably beautiful, and I am fulfilled with exploring close to home, reading, walks, writing, making music, and being with friends and family. I mourn the lack of time I spent in this region this summer (call the wahmbulance, I know). I love it here, and I feel most myself when I am rooted in this place most of the time.
My husband and I have already vowed there will be no big trips next year. I feel so much relief in that. Busy doesn’t work for me or my family, and I want to embrace that. I want to be home, I want to go slow, I want to be steady. I want to relish the enormous pleasure in the small joys all around me right where I am. I am happy here and I look forward to digging my roots in a little deeper this year.
xo
Shannon
Upcoming Shows
Poor Jakeb is probably not at all surprised to read what I wrote above. We have been working on making our 2025 show plans and I am pretty sure he has heard me say “I don’t want to travel too far” forty-eight times. That being said, our plans for this fall delight me because they are both local and very special!
Sept 13 - NFOTA Together We Can II - tickets and info
Sept 21 - Cultivate Festival - my favourite place to be! We’ve got three different performances happening this day, including a songwriters circle with other artists from the festival.
Oct 23 - Shelter Valley Concert Series - tickets and details TBA
Featured Song - I Want
An oldie but a goodies, this song explores the dichotomy between ambition and peace, busy-ness and coziness. “Mostly I want to spend my nights on the couch” may be the truest lyric I’ve ever written.
I like your line, "and I am fulfilled with exploring close to home". You can't get any fuller than fulfilled.