I am enthralled by books and TV shows about witches. In books and TV shows witches frequent libraries, they grow unruly gardens, they occasionally cook and when they do each recipe is of great importance and is received with fanfare. They light candles and live in old, interesting houses. They dress how they like and people mostly leave them alone. They find secret knowledge in poems. They pass wisdom down to their daughters. They love fiercely and protect their people vehemently. They have cats.
If I were a witch my housecoat would be a ceremonial robe. My overgrown garden would be mysterious and foreboding. My baking would be revered and feared. My cat would tell me secrets. These words that I write would glimmer with the blue sheen of magic and you, my reader, would unwittingly fall under my spell.
My songs would be incantations.
If I were a witch I would spend hours in the stacks of old, dusty libraries, threading my way through solid oak bookcases to find a hidden treasure no one else knows exists. I would have one or two close confidantes with whom I share my secrets.
My fascination with witches likely means that I simply want to be a writer and musician with a quiet home life and lots of time to dream. The only thing holding me back from being that person is the pursuit of productivity and success. If I worried less about getting to the next level or taking the next step on some path I am following for who knows what reason, I could spend more time baking and writing and library-ing.
I have been aimless these past few weeks, even as I’ve simultaneously felt the stirring to come out of hibernation and get going. I have a drive firing up in me but I have been pointing it in a myriad of different directions without sitting quietly and asking myself why. Why strive for that? Could I make a different, better choice? Could I do something with my time that makes me happier?
I wrote the first four paragraphs of this during a lockdown more than two years ago.
Lockdowns freed me.
My words from those days are more playful and whimsical than what I’ve been writing and thinking about lately. During lockdown I was all alone inside my own imagination instead of out in the world being perceived, and as such I got a little weirder and a little truer. I loved who I became, and I can see the ways I’ve smoothed the edges and tamed the wild in the years since those lockdown musings. I’ve been giving myself goals and checking them off the list, which is all well and good except my witch-wishing self has tucked herself into some dusty back corner and been ignored for too long.
I think it is time.
It is time to re-evaluate my plans and goals. It is time to ask myself where I feel most alive and where I feel burdened and bored. It is time to set at least one silly, frivolous goal for no other reason than to make myself laugh. It is time to plan adventures and dream up new schemes. It is time to sit around a fire and sing.
It is time to be wild and true, and to remember how to set myself free.
Upcoming Shows (Shannon and Jakeb)
April 20 - Camborne
Speaking of doing wild and true things, our Earth Month show with Katie Hoogendam and Whitney O’Hearn is just such a project. These fellow artists are kindred spirit coven-mates, and every time I create with either of them I feel soul-filled and a little bit more free. Imagine all of us together? Ugh, I can’t wait.
We are getting the little touches - like, oh I don’t know, a name and tickets - sorted out in the next couple weeks but I hope in the meantime you’ll save the date and plan to join us for something magical.
Featured Playlist - Please Collaborate! The Joy Just Because playlist
I’ve updated the playlist with some joyful - and a bit cheeky - songs, and I’d love it if you’d add your faves too! Definitely NSFW language in a few of the tunes (and one title) but they are just so fun so I hope you don’t faint from the shock.
Have a listen here and add a song or two that are making you feel wild and joyful.
xo
Shannon
I miss lockdowns too. I loved the gift of time that happened then. We had 4 others living in our home for 5 months during lockdown. I miss the creativity we drew on: pretending a snowy field on Racetrack Road was a beach and sitting there in our lawn chairs and drinking hot chocolate while the kids tobogganed. Pretending our basement was a new restaurant in town. Making huge bonfires and frolicking around them. Exploring nearby conservation areas. Exploring the world on Street View and making meals from the countries I "travelled" in. Despite all of the negative aspects of the pandemic, there were some lasting good memories.